Reposting our New Year’s advice from a couple of years ago. May you all have a joyful New Year with your families!
Tomorrow starts the new year and that means it’s time for resolutions. If your daughter is approaching puberty and your resolution is to explain things to her, here are 5 Tips to help guide the discussion about menstruation:
1. Don’t leave it up to the schools and Internet websites to deliver the information. Make time to connect with your daughter to talk about this important milestone, make sure she understands the information, and feels comfortable asking questions.
2. Share your own memories and experiences from this time in your life. Did you have any embarrassing moments? Where were you when you started your first period? When did you buy your first bra? Sharing your stories will help your daughter realize that she is not alone in this experience.
3. Ask other women in your family to share their stories which will provide a sense of family togetherness and will give your daughter an idea of how times have changed. For example, girls today don’t have to deal with the belt and napkin. It used to be that feminine hygiene products were not even advertised on TV.
4. Schedule a field trip with friends and their moms to the local drugstore to explore the feminine hygiene aisle. Today, these products are displayed abundantly, just like shampoo and other personal care essentials. A trip like this reinforces that these products are a normal part of life.
5. Remember to keep the lines of communication open and start early. Being open and honest with your daughter when she is in her early years will lay the foundation important conversations to take shape as she grows older and has even more challenging questions and issues on her mind. Try not to have one big talk. Instead, slip in nuggets of information into normal everyday conversation. And don’t wait for your daughter to initiate the conversation because she may be too embarrassed to do so.
I love these tips, with the exception of the feminine hygiene isle. Some girls might find it more efficient to do it in private. Maybe ask women you know for one of their pads to show your daughter the different types. That way she can touch them and feel them. My daughter is only 4 years old, but I talk with her openly about mommy having a period. ( I keep it age appropriate). But she is already talking about how she wants to use cloth pads like mommy does. And we have already started her a stash of pads for when she is old enough.
~ Bring Dad in on the conversation. Make sure that your daughter is able to talk to Dad and vice versa and that they are both comfortable doing so. Dad is going to have to make store runs or clothes change drop offs at the school in the event of an “accident” sometime.
Hopefully your tween already feels just as comfortable talking about all subject with both parents.
I did with both of mine, but in my tween to teen stage my Mom left us. Dad did both Dad and Mom duties and quite well. I was never uncomfortable or embarrassed to talk about my health issues with my Dad. And considering I was majorly irregular there was no plan and there were a great many change of clothes run to the school for Dad, Grandma, and Grandpa. It was embarrassing as all get up at school, but at home I never felt uncomfortable talking about things or asking for them to bring me clothes or “I need this at the store.”
And gratefully I had some pretty awesome teachers, good Dads at home I suppose too, because that is where it usually happened and they were always immensely understanding, quiet, and even let me borrow coats if needed to get to the nurses office without others noticing.
~Make a prepared kit just in case and everybody should know where it’s at.
We had an embarrassing little lesson in elementary school with our “interesting nurse”. I’ll spare yu the details. The only good thing about it was she gave us these kits with information, BUT more importanly samples of products and calendars to keep track when we would start and have our periods. Maybe it would be a good idea to put together your own kit with GladRags of course, a little pocket calendar, and some other goodies for that day. Maybe a couple notes from both Mom and Dad that she can always talk to them and how much they love her, with some tips from the family and friends on how to deal with different aspects. How to not be embarrassed to quietly tell the teacher or have a friend tell the teacher for her and so forth.